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Showing posts from August, 2013

The Onion’ Encourages Israel And Palestine Not To Give A Single, Goddamn Inch

As the ongoing conflict between Israelis and Palestinians once again threatens to intensify, the international community has called on both sides to come together and engage in peace talks. On Wednesday, leaders from both sides will meet face-to-face in Jerusalem for the first time in five years, to discuss the terms of a Palestinian state alongside Israel, the drawing of a secure border between the two nations, and the fate of Palestinian refugees. Ahead of these meetings,  The Onion  would like to firmly and categorically urge both Israelis and Palestinians to stand tall and steadfastly refuse to give up so much as a single inch during the negotiations. Israelis and Palestinians, you must accept nothing short of total victory against those who threaten your religion and way of life. Sacrificing just one of your ideals would at this point be tantamount to complete and utter failure. If a settlement is built, you must attack it. If a settlement is attacked, you must rebuild it.

Oh shit. I'm just bored.

A theory I adopted on minimizing tasks to make goals achievable: “...it's like this. Sometimes, when you've a very long street ahead of you, you think how terribly long it is and feel sure you'll never get it swept. And then you start to hurry. You work faster and faster and every time you look up there seems to be just as much left to sweep as before, and you try even harder, and you panic, and in the end you're out of breath and have to stop--and still the street stretches away in front of you. That's not the way to do it. You must never think of the whole street at once, understand? You must only concentrate on the next step, the next breath, the next stroke of the broom, and the next, and the next. Nothing else. That way you enjoy your work, which is important, because then you make a good job of it. And that's how it ought to be. And all at once, before you know it, you find you've swept the whole street clean, bit by bit. what's more, you are

May the winds blow their strength into you both.

It's a rainy Friday and the birthday blitz has come and gone. Leo's abound in this house and throughout the friends and family. We had three last week and two more the months prior, in this house alone. Speaking of months prior, July was a brute on my karma. Lost glasses, terminal iPhone mishap, lost email, sporadic wifi hotspots, mechanical breakdown, lousy weekend weather (everyones bad), wrong turns, overcooking, undercooking, heat-waves, enhanced hangovers (my bad), closed beaches and crowing roosters (rural campgrounds). August has been much more compassionate, so far. i ask that Buddha keeps it so. Prayers and good karma to my longtime buddy and close friend John Kuban and his wife Charlotte. Spinal surgery is scheduled this weekl and may he be back up and on his hawg before long. May the winds blow their strength into you both, and the storms their energy. I'll be in touch.